DE Pizza Review: Grotto Pizza (Rehoboth Beach)

Rating:

Final Composite Score: 4 out of 8 slices

[Her: 4 out of 8 slices]

[Him: 4 out of 8 slices]

Read the full "dialogue review" below this nice picture of "meh" pizza.

Photo by author. Actual pizzas consumed by your correspondents at Grotto Pizza. Note the signature Grotto Pizza cheese or sauce swirl.

Him:

This is our review of Grotto Pizza, and let me start by saying: if there is a venerable pizza institution in our region, it’s Grotto. They’re sixty-five years old, they’re headquartered right here in Rehoboth Beach, and everybody has taken their kids there — including us. Simply, you can't have a pizza blog on the Delmarva peninsula and ignore Grotto.

So, before we get into what we ate tonight, what are your memories of visiting Grotto in the past?

Her:

My main memories are of rainy days or those long, wandering Rehoboth days where we ended up at Grotto mostly because there was always a table available. We’d try to go to Nicola, and it would be an hour-plus wait, and the kids were starving, and honestly I was starving, and Grotto was the easy default. But I still have good memories of it, given all that.

Him:

My recollection is that what distinguishes Grotto is their signature swirl — the swirl of cheese... or sauce… or both? Is it both? I need to look at the picture again.

Her:

I don’t think it’s both, but yes, check the picture.

Him:

Regardless, my memory of Grotto Pizza is that it was entirely unmemorable. And my assessment after eating it tonight is that it is perfectly mediocre. If it weren’t for writing this review, I’m not sure I’d remember it at all.

Her:

I don’t completely agree. I remembered it having enough cheese that it reaches the edges and gets crisp where it hits the crust. And that’s still true. I also remembered it being very saucy — and it definitely still is. It was always fine to me. Not great, not bad, but consistent.

Him:

I agree it was okay — but for me, “okay” is the definition of mediocre. The cheese has almost no flavor. It’s a kind of mushy mass in your mouth. It does not taste like mozzarella, though it has a little bit of mozzarella-style pull. I checked their allergen chart, which I appreciate them providing, and they describe the cheese simply as “pizza cheese.” On another pizza — one we didn’t order — they explicitly call the cheese mozzarella. So from this, I conclude that “pizza cheese” is either not mozzarella or is some sort of blend.

Her:

I think it’s a blend — mozzarella, provolone, parmesan — something like that.

Him:

Possibly. Or maybe even cheddar. We saw one report suggesting it’s mild white cheddar, which from a pizza-purist perspective would be… not ideal.

Her:

Maybe it just melts more easily.

Him:

Maybe. In any case, we had a cheese pizza and a pepperoni pizza. And why did we get the pepperoni?

Her:

Because I wanted to order what a typical family would get. And that’s what Grotto is for — families. Although tonight there were several tables of adults without kids, so maybe that’s changing.

Him:

Okay, so what’s your assessment of the cheese, the sauce, the crust — and the pepperoni?

Her:

For me, the sauce and cheese felt like one combined component — almost like a saucy cheese poured onto the crust. I once read someone on Facebook say that Grotto pours the sauce on with a hose, which I thought was hilarious, but I kind of get it. It does taste like a saucy-cheesy mixture that’s been poured over everything. It’s very liquidy. It has pull, but it’s a very loose, very fluid topping. That sounds unappetizing when I describe it that way, but honestly, it tastes good. The sauce is sweet and has nice flavor. The cheese has a bit of flavor — not fresh mozzarella or anything, but pleasant enough. The crust has good texture; it could use more salt. It’s crisp, not too thick or thin, but it could use a little more chew.

And again, I love that the cheese goes all the way to the edge and gets crispy at the end. That’s my favorite part.

The pepperoni, though, tasted like the kind I’d buy at the grocery store. Nothing special. And because everything is so liquidy, the pepperoni doesn’t crisp or cup — it just sits there and gets lost in the sauce-cheese mixture. It was okay, but nothing more than that.

Him:

I think we are in violent agreement about Grotto. I’ve already said the cheese had almost no flavor. The sauce, however, is the saving grace of the pizza. It’s sweet, rich, and enjoyable — not bright or tomato-forward, but pleasant. I agree with you that the crust needs salt, though the form of the crust is right. It crunches, it holds together, but it could use more chew.

And I disagree even more strongly with you about the pepperoni — I thought it had almost no flavor at all. It was sliced so thinly that it didn’t crisp and didn’t add any real textural contrast. Honestly, I would’ve had trouble identifying which slice was cheese and which was pepperoni.

Her:

It is hard to see the pepperoni. It’s basically the same color as the hose-applied sauce.

Him:

Exactly. So I would say that Grotto scales the heights of mediocrity. And for that reason, I’m giving them a right-down-the-middle score of four slices out of eight.

What’s your score?

Her:

I’ll also give them a four. I thought you were going to go lower. It’s a four for me, but with a little nostalgia asterisk because everyone takes their kids there.

Him:

It really is an institution in this area. And you have to respect that. But you don’t necessarily have to enjoy it. We’ve said throughout this project that pizza should be a celebration, and this felt like the kind of pizza you serve at a birthday party for kids under eight — but not something you’d serve to adults who understand and love pizza.

Her:

Or to adults who read this blog!

Also, should we talk about the smell?

Him:

Go ahead.

Her:

There was definitely an ammonia smell — at least I hope it was ammonia — when we walked in. It was very noticeable until we started eating. That was disappointing. But in fairness, I still managed to eat about five slices.

Him:

In your defense, that was five slices out of the smaller twelve-inch pizza, not the sixteen-inch. They were small slices. You should absolutely feel better about yourself.

Still, it’s not the environment in which you want to eat. We don’t know whether this is a consistent thing at this Grotto or at others, and the staff probably didn’t even notice it after being in there all day.

Her:

We noticed it the second we walked in.

Him:

Yes, immediately.

So that’s our review of Grotto Pizza. For the record, we went to the Grotto Pizza on Rehoboth Avenue, a block off the boardwalk. The boardwalk Grotto was closed for the off-season. But honestly, we think all the Grottos are basically the same — that’s the whole idea behind a chain.

Her:

I agree.

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